"The pressure to be a part of the "popular" crowd is not a new ordeal
confronting teens, but the advanced technology may make them especially
pronounced for teens today than during the "corded phone" days of their
parents. With their parents' permission, some girls of the Summit
Area YMCA swim team and Westover School in Middlebury, Connecticut
opened up to "CBS This Morning" about the issues they're facing.
"I feel like a lot of girls feel pressured to look a certain way and act a certain one," said 18-year-old Sara. "People judge a friendship on how long your Snapchat streak is," said 14-year-old Allie."
While this article leans toward humor - I have long believed that there
is a parallel between toddlers and teens. Both are working to
understand themselves and their environment separately from their
parents. Both struggle with vocabulary (toddlers understanding words
and teens understanding their emotions)
Understanding the teen aged brain is crucial - it' s not an excuse for
behavior, but if we can begin to understand the process we will be much
more effective life teachers!
"As teens grow and develop, it can be tempting to assume that they can
think and behave just like adults. A little bit of time with a teen,
however, can starkly demonstrate just how differently they think and
act, and it is all due to brain development.
The Teenaged Brain A brain is like a complicated entertainment system that includes the
cable box, television, blu-ray player, and surround sound that are all
connected through wires. For adults, the parts of the brain work
together using a similar system of wires called synapses. The teenaged brain, however, has all of the parts, just not all of
the wires are hooked up. There may be too many input and output jacks in
some places and not enough in others. Plus, teens have the distinct
disadvantage of experiencing brain development from the back of the brain to the front. The very back of the brain that is connected to the spine controls
our involuntary functions. Moving up from there, we encounter the
hormonal and emotional centers of the brain. Last to develop is the
frontal lobe, which controls rational thought, judgment, and
self-control. Teen develop mirrors the development of a baby during his or her
first year, soaking up everything the world has to offer. Like young
children, teens need guidance, understanding, and patience from adults so that they can learn how to safely navigate the world.
Cell phones are becoming 'a given', but 'when' and 'how' are still a parent's decision.
"The question is not if, BUT WHEN your child is going to be ready for her very own phone? It’s inevitable. As we’ve talked about before, smart parents can no longer afford to keep their heads in the sand when it comes to technology and their children.
I have a 13 year old and she has not had a phone…until now."
To read the rest of Michelle Myers article, click here
Teaching financial literacy is the beginning of financial responsibility. Finding age appropriate ways to talk about money with our kids is important. This is a helpful place to begin!
"Families can use Money as You Grow to start a dialogue
about money and teach kids important lessons about saving, making choices, and avoiding debt. Put up a
Money as You Grow poster on your refrigerator, try the activities in your everyday life, and check
to see if your children know the milestones for their age groups." Click Here
We started out the summer with an idea for a contract - here is a version for the school year. It is so important to discuss and agree on expectations ahead of time! Click Here
I wrote this for ooph a little over a year ago. Now having two girls and with Ellie getting older this list is becoming more important in our house. I have added one more to this list. I never really put much thought into number six until someone said it to my son.
Often I have parents who are frustrated that they can't seem to get their kids to talk with them. Kids often feel like the dinner table is The Grand Inquisition... Here is a great article and super suggestions for breaking the ice.
How do I get my kids to talk to me?
Listening and talking are learned behaviors. How your children will
communicate with others and you is something they are learning from you. Are you talking with and listening to them every day? About things
that don’t matter, not just peppering them with questions? Is your
homework done? Is your room clean? Did you do what I asked you to do?
Many families with high school juniors are launching into the college process this spring. While it is an exciting time it can also be a very stressful process. Here is a great article to help pave the way.
"In the "good old days" of college admissions, parents would
show up at my door during the summer before their child's senior year
and ask for help with choosing colleges and getting in. Except in rare
cases, it was assumed that it didn't really matter what a student
majored in; somehow, someday everything would just work out. There were
plenty of jobs for college graduates, regardless of their majors in
college."Even Middle School Parents Want Advice about College AdmissionsWhat Employers Say They Want from College GradsAPPLYING TO THINKING-ORIENTED COLLEGESFor the full article click here
"Adults play a critical role in keeping an open dialogue with young
people and making them aware of the typical behaviors that mark this
cruel form of social aggression. Knowledge is power; when girls know
what relational bullying looks and feels like, they are better able to
make a conscious choice to move away from friends who use these
behaviors." Signe Whitson
Helping our kids to understand the value of education - truly
Kids cheat in school because they think grades
are more important than what they learn. They take short-cuts because they
believe the longer, harder path has no value or because they are afraid of
stumbling or of being seen as someone who stumbles. Michael Mulligan
Jennifer Wagner wrote a great article an specific strategies for connecting with teens; especially helpful as we launch into the holiday season. Here are some great suggestions for finding time to connect with your kids
At least in my home,
having long conversations with my teens never began with “How was your day?” or
“What happened in school today?” Those questions were actually
conversation stoppers, not starters. However, I found that if was well versed
in things they liked, such as their favorites in pop culture and technology, I
could talk to them about those things for hours. Once you open the door to
conversation, you never know what else might come out. Here are some examples
of how to connect with your teens through pop culture and technology
At
least in my home, having long conversations with my teens never began
with “How was your day?” or “What happened in school today?” Those
questions were actually conversation stoppers, not starters. However, I
found that if was well versed in things they liked, such as their
favorites in pop culture and technology, I could talk to them about
those things for hours. Once you open the door to conversation, you
never know what else might come out. Here are some examples of how to
connect with your teens through pop culture and technology: - See more
at:
http://understandingteenagers.com.au/blog/2010/11/5-ways-to-connect-with-your-teens-2/#sthash.WCoRnPda.dpuf
At
least in my home, having long conversations with my teens never began
with “How was your day?” or “What happened in school today?” Those
questions were actually conversation stoppers, not starters. However, I
found that if was well versed in things they liked, such as their
favorites in pop culture and technology, I could talk to them about
those things for hours. Once you open the door to conversation, you
never know what else might come out. Here are some examples of how to
connect with your teens through pop culture and technology: - See more
at:
http://understandingteenagers.com.au/blog/2010/11/5-ways-to-connect-with-your-teens-2/#sthash.WCoRnPda.dpuf
For many parents and teachers, it’s the first opportunity of the school
year to sit down face to face and discuss everything from curriculum to
issues that arise in the classroom. Here are some tips from both sides
of the desk on how to make the most of a parent-teacher conference.
Do Your Homework
Join Forces
Open Lines of Communication
Aim for Action
Keep in Touch
We want to raise kind children. We want them
to be a good friend and have good friends. Our children learn so much
from our interactions with others (see previous post about Accidental
Teaching). This article speaks specifically about girls, but the message
applies to boys as as well.
While this article leans toward humor - I have long believed that there
is a parallel between toddlers and teens. Both are working to
understand themselves and their environment separately from their
parents. Both struggle with vocabulary (toddlers understanding words
and teens understanding their emotions) 
We started out the summer with an idea for a contract - here is a version for the school year. It is so important to discuss and agree on expectations ahead of time!
"In the "good old days" of college admissions, parents would
show up at my door during the summer before their child's senior year
and ask for help with choosing colleges and getting in. Except in rare
cases, it was assumed that it didn't really matter what a student
majored in; somehow, someday everything would just work out. There were
plenty of jobs for college graduates, regardless of their majors in
college."
"Adults play a critical role in keeping an open dialogue with young
people and making them aware of the typical behaviors that mark this
cruel form of social aggression. Knowledge is power; when girls know
what relational bullying looks and feels like, they are better able to
make a conscious choice to move away from friends who use these
behaviors." Signe Whitson
5 tips for a better parent-teacher conference
For full article click here