CONSEQUENCES

Effective consequences for teenagers!  

If you’re having trouble giving effective consequences to your teen, know that you are not alone. Many parents tell me that nothing seems to work, and that coming up with the right thing for their child can seem like an impossible task. If you’re the parent of an adolescent, you may have grounded your child, taken away their video games, or suspended their driving privileges for months on end. But as James Lehman says, you can’t punish kids into acceptable behavior—it just doesn’t work that way.

Effective consequences are ones that are connected to the original behavior, and are both task- and time-specific.

"Connected to the original behavior” means that your consequence needs to be related to the behavior you want to see your child change or improve. 

“Task specific” means that there is something your child needs to accomplish, or practice related to the original problem. This is a concrete behavior, like washing the dishes, meeting curfew, or not swearing. 

“Time specific” means there is a specific amount of time in which he needs to demonstrate that behavior.  

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